Let me preface this post by saying I cringe every time I write “Black.” I know what that word means when referencing a group of people, but not everyone does. Therefore, to keep from confusing people with the use of (correct) words like Aboriginal & Aborigine, I will suffer through with “Black.”
Recently, I had a young lady affectionately known as Fe contact me via Instagram. It was super random…I mean REALLY random…like a Monday night random. She only knew of me from whatever I posted on IG, so basically she didn’t know me. She sent me a message asking if I was in Baltimore and inviting me to flow (have a yoga session) with her. I responded excitedly and we scheduled to meet up on Labor Day for a couple of hours. During our session we learned that we both are Social Workers in Baltimore and graduated from the same school – ON THE SAME DAY! Talk about the Universe conspiring! She learned that I am a yoga instructor and I learned that she would begin instructor training soon. So of course I offered encouragement AND had her instruct me! We talked and flowed and talked some more. She told me that she would be moving to Baltimore soon and wanted to meet like-minded Black women, which prompted her message to me on IG. She expressed how glad she was that she had reached out to me and I did the same. The time spent wasn’t extremely long but it was all that we needed to make an impact on one another.
As I left the park where we met I started thinking. Why don’t Black women do things like this more often? Why don’t we see & acknowledge a dope sistah and just reach out more often? Why aren’t we receptive to dope sistahs who see our “dopeness?” Black women are often seen and portrayed as self-serving, backstabbing, selfish, aggressive, and ignorant beings. Thanks to reality television, we (Black Women) are flooded with the images of hating, fighting, and tearing each other down; and we glorify it – adding salt to an open wound! We praise the shady moments and the disrespect of one another on national television; unfortunately, this has bled into OUR realities. We literally have become crabs in a barrel. We would rather see our sistah fall flat on her face instead of fly…and probably because we never viewed her as a “sister” to begin with. We have become so engrossed in the “competition” that we never stop to realize how powerful we are united. I’m not judging sis because we all are guilty of it in one way or another. Whether you’ve side-eyed the pretty girl that walked into the room or withheld business tips, in some way you have participated in creating and/or recycling the same nasty energy. Why? You didn’t want HER to shine brighter than YOU.
We have to get over this mentality and understand that we shine our brightest in lifting one another! In a world that constantly beats us up and puts us down, we HAVE to do better with standing up and standing FOR each other. When you’re afforded the opportunity to assist your sistah in building herself you have been divinely entrusted. Whether you are providing encouragement, tips, resources, or financial support, count every last one of those opportunities as a blessing. You have been given the divine privilege to pour something edifying into another woman of color and in those moments you are fulfilling your calling; there is NO greater blessing than that. I’m charging you to do something outside of your norm to elevate another sistah and watch how you’ll begin to make new friends on a whim.
Love & Light
S/O to my new sister-you-friend Felicia (@flow.with.fe) & photo cred to Jabari (@thejbphotos)!